I didn’t find Reiki. Reiki found me

Onelia Castelan

Jun 26

5 min read

Onelia practices Reiki in nature, reconnecting with the energy that transformed her life.

Losing my husband broke my heart. Discovering his betrayal shattered my identity.

I was married for seven years, years I believed were perfect. I was in college and working towards my degree, dreaming of graduating so we could finally start a family. My life felt stable, hopeful, and aligned.

One night, while I was home studying for my midterms, my husband called and asked if I wanted anything from White Castle, a fast-food restaurant. I said yes and asked him to bring me chicken onion rings, something I loved back then. It was around 1:00 a.m. on February 12, 2007.

Not long after, my neighbor called. “Did you hear a gunshot?” she asked. I said no. Then she asked, “Is Jose with you?” Jose was my husband, a Chicago police officer.

In that instant, my intuition knew.

I ran outside without thinking—no jacket, no sweater, snow covering the ground, the cold biting my skin. I rushed toward him and saw him lying face down, still holding the bag of White Castle food in his hand. There was no blood. I didn’t understand what had happened.

He was still alive.

I kneeled beside him, lifting him into my lap, begging him to talk to me. “Are you okay? Are you hurt? Please talk to me!” My neighbors and I called 911. They arrived quickly, but before they could help, he took one deep breath—in my lap—and he was gone.

That moment has never left me.

At the hospital, I was told he had sustained a single gunshot wound to the chest. During the investigation, detectives asked me many questions about his life, his routines, and our marriage. It was then that I learned something that caused my entire body to tremble.

They informed me that my husband had been seeing someone else—and that she was pregnant. In that moment, I realized he had been living a double life, and the perfect life I believed I had was a lie.

My heart collapsed.

I couldn’t believe he was gone, taking his secrets with him, and at the same time, I couldn’t scream at him. I couldn’t ask why. Why did you do this to me? To us? What did I do to deserve this? There were no answers. Only grief and a pain so heavy I could barely live with it.

No medication could ease the pain. The grief trapped in my chest was heavy and suffocating. My identity and my sense of worth disappeared; the woman named Onelia no longer existed.

One day while driving, I broke down in tears uncontrollably. Aloud I cried, “God, I can’t take this pain anymore. I don’t know what to do. I give it all to You. Please give me the strength and guidance I need.” In that quiet moment, I heard a small, gentle voice say, Don’t worry. Everything is going to be all right.

Not long after, during a routine visit with my beautician, she asked me, “Onelia, have you ever heard of Reiki?” I said no. She told me teachers from New York were coming to teach and asked if I wanted to attend.

I said yes. I had nothing to lose.

Reiki gave me what I had been searching for: peace, healing, self-worth, and love for myself. I tried to find this in church, but Reiki opened a different doorway. Through this practice, I developed a deeper relationship with myself and with God—one rooted in presence, trust, and compassion.

In 2009, two years after my loss, I became a Reiki Level I and Level II practitioner. At that time, I had no intention of working with others. My main purpose was to heal my heart—to heal myself. Reiki was for me. I practiced the Reiki Principles of Mikao Usui daily: Just for today, do not be angry. Do not worry. Be filled with gratitude. Devote yourself to your work. Be kind to people. Slowly, these principles brought me into the present moment—something that once felt impossible.¹

Chicago police officers honored Jose, Onelia’s husband, during his funeral service.

Reiki, founded by Mikao Usui in Japan in the early twentieth century, is a gentle, hands-on energy healing practice rooted in spiritual discipline and self-awareness. The Reiki Principles were intended not only as ethical guidance but as daily anchors for mindful living and inner balance. For me, they became a lifeline—simple truths that helped rebuild my inner world one moment at a time.

I continued healing. Eight years later, I found love again. God blessed me with an incredible man and, eventually, two beautiful sons. I also graduated from college with a degree in interior design. I worked actively in design until I became pregnant with my second son, then stayed home to be fully present with my children.

Something unexpected happened next.

Through Reiki and years of healing, Onelia found love again and built a family rooted in peace, gratitude, and resilience.

Women began opening up to me—sharing their pain, their stories, and their wounds. I was called to share Reiki with them. I offered sessions freely, simply because I genuinely wanted to help. They kept returning, often leaving donations.

Soon, one of my Reiki teachers said to me, “Onelia, you need to charge for your services,” while gently reminding me of Mikao Usui’s teachings. He initially offered Reiki at no charge and observed that while people experienced healing, many returned to old habits and patterns. Over time, he recognized that when you give something to someone and receive nothing in exchange, it is often not genuinely valued. When people invest in their healing, they honor it more deeply and take greater responsibility for their transformation.

I will be honest; charging has been one of my greatest challenges. Charging still feels difficult at times. Yet remembering these teachings continues to guide me, helping me honor both the practice of Reiki and the value of the healing it offers.

I continued my education, completing Reiki III and eventually my Reiki Master Teacher level of Usui Shiki Ryoho Reiki with Susana Garcia in 2023. In 2024, I studied under William Lee Rand and became an Usui/Holy Fire® III Reiki Master.

Now I understand my purpose.

I am here to support women who have lost their identity—not only through grief, but through motherhood, betrayal, relationships, or expectations that no longer serve them. Reiki found me when I was broken, and through it, I learned that healing is possible.

Reiki is now woven into every part of my life. Everyone in my household uses Reiki. When my boys are sick, they ask me, “Mami, can you give me Reiki?” I always say, “Of course.” Even my husband is now a believer, having experienced firsthand how this gentle, powerful energy works. Reiki is my key in everything I do—when I drink water, eat, sleep, or step outside my home. I bless my car and my house with Reiki. Reiki is everywhere; I see it everywhere, and I consciously implement it into every aspect of my life. I will be forever grateful.

Today, I no longer design homes. I help women redesign their lives.

I am centered.

I am love.

I am peace.

I am enough.

I am worthy.